as of this moment i am letting you know that i am currently having a Grey's Anatomy emotional overdose... so if things are a bit too dramatic.. too emotional... too deep.. or too pink and squishy... Seriously, then stop reading and dont complain. SERIOUSLY!
at what point in our lives do we cross that line to where we suddenly start loving someone? i mean one day.. your total strangers.. and the next you cant seem to function properly without them. some people fall in love easily.. others take a while. what makes people diff? why do some ppl cross that line much easier or sooner than others?
speaking of that line... have you ever wondered about it? how messy and uncharted that line could be? how scary it is to be walking that line when you .. just like anyone else is broken and damaged at some point in their lives?
why cant we control who we fall in love with? why does it just happen?
what are the factors.. that make u love one person and not the other? even if you are more certain that a specific person is better for you than any other person but you still cant love him or her? or why do we sometimes love people and they cant seem to love us back the way we want them to? or xpress themselves the way we want them to?
yet, we still go back out there.. hurting.. trying to walk and cross that line until we find someone who will love us back.. and who is willing to help each other grow to be great human beings.
What about loving someone and you have a fear of telling them? mayb you dont know how they'll react and for the first time in your life you wont be able to stand the fact that they just may not react the way you would like them to.
i guess in the end.. a relationship... even between friends.. cant really be defined.. all relationships are different. Just like people are different. We have different backgrounds, we react differently to things and we have different outlooks to life. The secret isnt finding someone who is like you.. the secret is finding someone who is compatible to you and is willing to stick through it and work at it as much as you are. Making it work together.
( i may be wrong and in a few years or even a few months i may come back and say that i was wrong )
the only thing we can do is cherish all the friendships and love that we have... and take it one step at a time.. take each baby step together. No matter how much you think you're ready to take the next step.. you can't leave anyone behind so, we wait.. give support and be patient.
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9 comments:
i ask myself that all the time ... u put it nicely ... nice blog
please share if you think you've found any answers to any of the questions you've been asking yourself ;)
thanks for the comment :)
Why is love so selfish? All love, for friends, family, lover, selfish. Why do we ask so much from others? Why do we think that if love isn't reciprocated in the same amount as we give them, that it is damaging to us? True love means transcending this selfishness. But how do we get there?
I read this guy Osho, and he says in one of his books (called Intimacy), that too often, in our relationships, we dwell on the what-ifs and the what-if-nots. He suggests enjoying the moment, the right-now, to leave aside the past and the future, because no amount of planning will actually prepare us for what lies ahead, so why bother? We can expect to be ditched or betrayed, and yet, when the time comes, we would be just as heart-broken, only for a longer period of time because of that extra time we devoted in the anticipation of this heartbreak.
Carpe diem. Seize the day. Gather ye rosebuds while ye may.
There are no answers to our questions, only more questions.
i agree.. most ppl do fall into that hole where we want everyone to love us the same way and amount that we think we love them. Which ofcourse is wrong on one main reason, since we are all different we can't expect that person to love us they way we love them ( those differences may be the exact reasons why we love and care for that person so much )
I think people should atleast demand for the right to be loved and respected. Even if we aren't they loved the way we want or dream of... the lease a person could do is "verbalize" their love every so often.. as human beings... and Im guessing mostly women need to hear these words often... be it from a mother, a father, a sibling, a friend or a lover. Hearing it takes it to a whole new level, seals it and confirms it.
If we live in the here and the now.. living the moment without thinking much into whats going to happen... how can we ever be prepared for heartache?
We should hope for the best but be prepared for the worst.. especially if things are at new stages.. and things arent stable in any relationship.. you can't meet a new friend and not be prepared for that friend to suddenly decide he/she doesnt want to hang out with you anymore. ( yes i know lame xample but i cudnt think of another )
hey its how it is. i mean take us for example...we've never met, but would you say we don't know each other? we've never met, but would you say we are not friends? i don't know about you but ive met people and i could consider you a closer friend than they have been. was it my choice or yours to choose each other as to what role we have in each other's life? it was you doing that's made you a friend to me and vice versa. we dont choose. the other chooses for us. get my point? i really hope so...:D cheer up u squishy, pinkish little girl. there's more to life than being too affected by the little things.:D
i understand what you're saying... but in our case it turned out for the better... but what about the countless times a person loves another and for a while they cant control that they loved that person... even when that person isnt good for them. While others, can't seem to get themself to fall in love with the person that loves them and is a good person for them?
ppl hide away their feelings too often out of experience from past heartaches.. but what ppl dont realize is that doing xactly that.. hiding feelings.. is the reason most ppl are so confused and somewhat... i duno.. mayb mislead?
p.s. the squishy, pinkish little girl sentence made me smile :)
"I think people should atleast demand for the right to be loved and respected."
There is a very fine line between love and respect. I can respect a person without loving him, and love a person without respecting him. They can (and most of the time, they do) overlap, but they are two different ideas. For one thing, love can't ever be demanded from another person. This is what I meant by selfless love, to let go of this urge to pull out the same kind of emotion from another person. When we are hurting from some heartache, it's usually out of frustration because we don't feel the love reciprocated. Which brings me back to my question, how do we transcend to unselfish love? It would save us a lot of trouble.
"If we live in the here and the now.. living the moment without thinking much into whats going to happen... how can we ever be prepared for heartache?"
I don't think we can ever be prepared for heartache. How ever much we prepare for it, whatever shield and ammunition we have, we will always be devastated by it. We are robbing ourselves of time because we don't enjoy what we have now. We spend so much time worrying about the future. Let go, let time take its toll. What will be, will be.
I've met so many people who have touched my life and made me a better person, who have given me so much, who have also disappeared, or moved on, and now, all I have of them is that time I spent having so much fun. I am devastated by their absence in my life, but I've gained so much from them that it makes up for it.
It's very idealistic, and it's the most difficult thing in the world, to let go. But we can't go on with our lives worrying if the sky will fall down on us and shatter everything we have, because, after all, what if it doesn't?
ok... but why is it sometimes so hard to acknowledge to yourself just how important someone has become? why is it so scary to let yourself actually sit there and let those facts sink in.. why do some people feel a tiny sense of panic or a bit of fear.. i know its related to fear of losing that person..
good to know that i can still make people smile...:D
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